Pursue Your Joy (No Matter Who Gets Hurt)
by Marek Glinski
Joy doesn't come to you. You have to go find it! Attaining joy can take sacrifice, single-minded focus, and behavior that hopefully nobody catches on video. You never know where you're going to find your true happiness, but you have to keep looking, as I learned first hand one unforgettable evening!
Here is my personal journey from misery to bliss. May this story instruct and inspire you in your own pursuit of joy, or at least get you to drive up the viewing metrics on this web site.
Run a marathon, not a sprint
It was dusk in the city, and my heart hurt. I had been wandering the crowded street, searching for the source of my joy for what felt like ever–at least 15 minutes–and it was starting to get dark. But dark shmark! My unquenchable desire burned like a flame that lit my way forward.
My head was bowed in determination. My eyes scanned the pavement exhaustively, though all I saw was litter and questionable footwear choices. Yet no matter how many Miu Miu thong toe booties I was forced to endure, I. Would. Find. It. That thing I wanted. That elusive goal that propelled me forward. The promise of happiness.
Prepare for the unexpected
Just as I was starting to lose hope, I saw, in my path, a sweet-faced child. She couldn't have been more than 5 years old. There she stood before me. Bright, blue eyes. Golden curls like an angel. Rosy cheeks. And an open, trusting smile.
I stared down at her for maybe a minute, and she just calmly stayed where she was, radiating innocence and cheer. Then, she held up a little red ball. I considered the ball for a moment, then grabbed it from her and moved on. I didn't particularly want the ball, but if that's what it took to get the kid out of my way…
I continued on my way with the sound of the child bawling and the mom, yelling after me, "She just wanted to play with you. Can you please give the ball back?" Or something like that. It was noisy on the street and I was on a mission. On I went, irritated by the delay, but not deterred. My eyes once again scanned the street, registering more thong booties, the inevitable Crocs, some Uggs (ugh!), and those hateful flip-flops.
Use what you got in a pinch
Then I heard a bunch of people go, "Awwwwww!" And I saw the reason. Out of nowhere, a little stray dog limped into my view. It looked so cold, hungry, and miserable. But when it saw me, it managed to wag its wee stub of a tail and sit on its itty-bitty haunches.
I took in this suffering, unloved creature as it cocked its little ears at me, almost hopefully, seemingly imploring me to take it home and care for it. I realized that something had to be done. So, I threw the ball down some alley, and the mongrel chased it. I took off like a bat out of hell before the dog could bring the ball back. Whew, that was close!
Recognize your opportunity
And so, my journey continued, street after street, Ugg after Ugg. It got later and later–like five minutes or so–and my heart sank into despair. Would I never find my bliss?
And then I saw him!
He was a Buddhist monk in a flowing red robe. His facial expression beneath his shaved head registered mindfulness and compassion. There was no doubt in my mind: This holy man had the key, the answer!
He was escorting a blind, elderly woman across the street. It was taking forever, and I almost felt like yelling, "Hurry the hell up!". Finally, he sent the crone on her way, and I approached him. He regarded me and smiled gently.
I cleared my throat and spoke: "Hello. We've never met, but I think you have something I want."
"Good evening, my friend," he said. "What is it that you seek?"
I earnestly replied, "I dropped my Snickers bar a few blocks back, and I'm pretty sure I saw you pick it up. I'd like it back please. I'm starting to get hypoglycemic."
The monk reflected for a moment and then said kindly, "My friend, forgive me, but you are mistaken. I did not pick up a Snickers bar off the street today. But I would be honored to teach you to let go of your attachments, which cause you suffering."
Do what you need to do
So, I punched him a few times. He dropped like a sack of potatoes. Then I sat on top of him and searched him. No Snickers bar. My bad. But I did find a Twix. Good enough. I had epic munchies by now, and it wasn't time to be picky. I was about to tear it open, when the monk hit me in the head with one of his Birkenstocks. I fell off him, and he kicked me hard you know where.
"That's my Twix, bitch," said the monk as I watched the little stars whirl around my head.
"It WAS your Twix, Baldy," I said as I regained lucidity and kicked him in the abdomen, sending him back down.
Negotiate when necessary
We pounded the shit out of each other for a while until we overheard some goody-goody calling 911. Given that I had a record, I thought it was time for a compromise. I managed to gasp "Splitsies?" while he was choking me.
Turns out, the monk had a record, too. Splitsies it was. As Buddhist monks go, he turned out not to be such a bad egg. He even used part of his robe to wipe the blood that was gushing out of my eye socket. The blood didn't show up too much since the robe was red already. Win win.
Learn from you experiences
I took away important lessons from that night:
I actually prefer Twix to Snickers. Who knew!
Too many people wear Miu Miu thong toe booties. Way too many!
Happiness may be elusive, but I'll always find it. Even though I only have one functioning eye!